I am a mature adult.

So I started reading Divergent by Veronica Roth, and it's really good! I just love it so far, even though I haven't made it that far in.

In the book, the city is divided into five sections: Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Erudite, and Dauntless. The main character starts out in Abnegation, which emphasizes selflessness. And I started thinking, Man. Abnegation people are the type of people who let people cut in front of them while they're waiting for the bathroom until they're having a meltdown.

And that led to this.

(Click for big.)

No regrets.

"Is Your Book Good, Great, or HOT?"

(Relevant link that pretty much cracked me up with the title.)

Disclaimer: I am just kidding you guys. Also this is the best possible first post of the year. Also I'm really sorry if this offends you and I promise never to make these kinds of jokes here again.


My book is SO hot!

"How hot is it?"

It's so hot that it comes with its own fire extinguisher.

It's so hot that when it touches one page to another, it sizzles a little.

It's so hot that everybody at the library wants to check it out.

It's SOOO HOT that it runs at 451 degrees Fahrenheit.

(Best for last.)

My book is so hot that when it walks down the street, librarians wolf-whistle and go, "Hot dog, check out the binding on that fine piece of print."